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Today's mantra is gratitude

The days are full of storybook romance
the myriad of thoughtful acts 
A million ways I'm into you
I'm never getting over you
I'm sorry for exposing you 
I know you hate it when I do
But I had to write one for my better half

The days are new, the nights unwind 
You break my world, you change my mind 
Run out of love, come down from life
Run out of pain, my life has changed

It's obvious it's all been said in cheesy poems and chick flicks 
The mushy shit that people say, it makes us chuckle everyday 
So how can I express to you the recent dramas we've been through 
I wouldn't have been fine without your help

The days are new, the nights unwind 
You touch my world, you change my life 
Run out of love, run out of life 
Come down from hate, the world has changed

But we may never have met if it weren't for him 
Hey Derrick, maybe somehow you're listening

Today's mantra is gratitude 
You changed my life
I'm sure you knew 
I'll never forget the words that you said
The life that you lead 
I'll never forget, I'll never forget

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Cavanaugh Park

At Cavanaugh Park
Where I used to sit all alone in the dark
And dream about things that I cannot say
you always said destiny'd blow me away
and nothing's gonna blow me away

At Cavanaugh Park
Where you used to take me to play in the sand
And said to me, "Son, one day you'll be a man
And men can do terrible things."
Yes they can

At Cavanaugh Park
We used to get high
Watching teams as they fought
They loved my friend Adam
But he always got caught
Man, that kid made fucking up look cool
Aren't we all so cool now? no

At Cavanaugh Park
Where I used to think that this life would be good
And I would do things that I thought that I should
And no one's gonna tear me down

And there was never any place
For someone like me to be totally happy
I'm runnin' out of clock and that ain't a shock
Some things never do change

Never do change

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Man, I see in fight club the strongest and smartest men who've ever lived.
 I see all this potential, and I see squandering.
 God damn it, an entire generation pumping gas, waiting tables; 
slaves with white collars.
 Advertising has us chasing cars and clothes, 
working jobs we hate so we can buy shit we don't need. 
We're the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place.
 We have no Great War. No Great Depression. 
Our Great War's a spiritual war... our Great Depression is our lives.
 We've all been raised on television
 to believe that one day we'd all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. 
But we won't. And we're slowly learning that fact. 
And we're very, 
pissed off. 

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Why does only goodbyes show us how much we truly mean to each other
The beautiful things that we're not ready to lose or have yet to try
Knowledge does not come in books it comes in caskets
I don't wanna see how brave we can be anymore
I've seen the strength it takes to get past and move on
And would trade it all away to know how to keep you here forever
Maybe I've grown too old
Missed out on the glamour and the glory
Just can't see past the tears and the pain
Oh please don't bury me in the ra

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Could it be I'm a lonely one
that made everything so upsidedown now
could it be all the lies I told that gave
nightmares to me after an olympic day
you said everything was fine
but I saw you through
and I knew that I was just as bad as you.
Never said I would give you up
but if I must then tell me why now
never said I believed in all those things I've heard
about you from those rumours now
I thought everything was fine
but you proved me wrong
and I was taken by surprise. 

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The Decline II

Serotonin's gone
She gave up, drifted away
Sara fled, thought process gone
She left her answering machine on
The greeting left spoken sincere
Messages no one will ever hear

Ten thousand messages a day
A million more transmissions lay
Victims of the laissez faire
Ten thousand voices, a hundred guns
A hundred decibels turns to one
One bullet, one empty head
Now with Serotonin gone

The man who used to speak
Performs a cute routine
Feel a little patronized
Don't feel bad
They found a way inside your head
And you feel a bit misled
It's not that they don't care, yeah

The television's put a thought inside your head
Like a Barry Manilow, jingle
I'd like, to teach the world to sing
In perfect harmony
A symphonic blank stare, yeah
It doesn't make you care
Not designed to make you care
They're betting you won't care

Place a wager on your greed
A wager on your pride
Why try to beat them when, a million others tried?

We are the whore
Intellectually spayed
We are the queer
Dysfunctionally raised

One more pill to kill the pain
One more pill to kill the pain
One more pill to kill the pain
Living through conformity

One more prayer to keep me safe
One more prayer to keep us warm
One more prayer to keep us safe
There's gonna be a better place

Lost the battle, lost the war
Lost the things worth living for
Lost the will to win the fight
One more pill to kill the pain

The going get tough, the tough get debt
Don't pay attention, pay the rent
Next of kins pay for your sins
A little faith should keep us safe

Save us
The human, existence
Is failing, resistance
Essential, the future
Written off, the odds are
Astronomically against us
Only moron and genius
Would fight a losing battle
Against the super ego
When giving in is so damn comforting

And so we go, on with our lives
We know the truth, but prefer lies
Lies are simple, simple is bliss
Why go against tradition when we can
Admit defeat, live in decline
Be the victim of our own design
The status quo, built on suspect
Why would anyone stick out their neck?

Fellow members of
Club "We've Got Ours"
I'd like to introduce you to our host
He's got his, and I've got mine
Meet the decline

We are the queer
We are the whore
In the class war
We are worker
We love our queen
We sacrifice
We're soilent green

somos lo raro
somos la puta municion
en esta guerra de clases

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The Decline I

Where are all the stupid people from?
And how'd they get to be so dumb?
Bred on purple mountain range
Feed amber waves of grains
To lesser human beings, zero feelings

Blame it on
Human nature, mans destiny (mans destiny)
Blame it on the greediocracy (greediocracy)
Fear of God
The fear of change
The fear of truth

Add the Bill of Rights, subtract the wrongs
There's no answers
Memorize and sing star spangled songs
When the questions
Aren't ever asked
Is anybody learning from the past?
We're living in united stagnation

Father what have I done?
I took that .22
A gift to me from you
To bed with me each night
Kept it clean
Polished it well
Cherished every cartridge, every shell

Down, by the creek, under brush, under dirt
There's a carcass of my second kill
Down, by the park, under stone, under pine
There's a carcass of my brother William
Brother where, have you gone to?
I swear, I never thought I could
I see so many times
They told me to shoot straight
Don't pull the trigger, squeeze
That will insure a kill
A kill is what you want
A kill is why we breed
The Christians love their guns
The church and NRA
Pray for their salvations
Prey on the lower faiths

The story book's been read
And every line believed
Curriculum's been set
Logic is a threat
Reason searched and seized

Jerry spent some time in Michigan
A twenty year vacation, after all he had a dime
A dime is worth a lot more in Detroit
A dime in California, a twenty dollar fine

Jerry only stayed a couple months
It's hard to enjoy yourself while bleeding out the ass
Asphyxiation is simple and fast
It beats seventeen fun years of being someone's bitch

Don't think (Stay)
Drink your wine (Home)
Watch the fire burn (Be)
His problems not mine (Safe)
Just be that model citizen

I wish I had a schilling
For every senseless killing
I'd buy a government
America's for sale
And you can get a good deal on it
And make a healthy profit
Or maybe, tear it apart
Start with assumption
That a million people are smart
Smarter than one

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Flawless II

Dear Stan,
 I meant to write you sooner but I just been busy
You said your girlfriend's pregnant now, how far along is she?
Look, I'm really flattered you would call your daughter that
and here's an autograph for your brother,
I wrote it on the Starter cap
I'm sorry I didn't see you at the show, I musta missed you
Don't think I did that shit intentionally just to diss you
But what's this shit you said about you like to cut your wrists too?
I say that shit just clownin dogg,
c'mon - how fucked up is you?
You got some issues Stan, I think you need some counseling
to help your ass from bouncing off the walls when you get down some
And what's this shit about us meant to be together?
That type of shit'll make me not want us to meet each other
I really think you and your girlfriend need each other
or maybe you just need to treat her better
I hope you get to read this letter, I just hope it reaches you in time
before you hurt yourself, I think that you'll be doin just fine
if you relax a little, I'm glad I inspire you but Stan
why are you so mad?  Try to understand, that I do want you as a fan
I just don't want you to do some crazy shit
I seen this one shit on the news a couple weeks ago that made me sick
Some dude was drunk and drove his car over a bridge
and had his girlfriend in the trunk, and she was pregnant with his kid
and in the car they found a tape, but they didn't say who it was to
Come to think about, his name was.. it was you

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Flawless I

Dear Mister-I'm-Too-Good-To-Call-Or-Write-My-Fans,
this'll be the last package I ever send your ass
It's been six months and still no word - I don't deserve it?
I know you got my last two letters;
I wrote the addresses on 'em perfect
So this is my cassette I'm sending you, I hope you hear it
I'm in the car right now, I'm doing 90 on the freeway
Hey Slim, I drank a fifth of vodka, you dare me to drive?
You know the song by Phil Collins, "In the Air of the Night"
about that guy who coulda saved that other guy from drowning
but didn't, then Phil saw it all, then at a show he found him?
That's kinda how this is, you coulda rescued me from drowning
Now it's too late - I'm on a 1000 downers now, I'm drowsy
and all I wanted was a lousy letter or a call
I hope you know I ripped ALL of your pictures off the wall
I love you Slim, we coulda been together, think about it
You ruined it now, I hope you can't sleep and you dream about it
And when you dream I hope you can't sleep and you SCREAM about it
I hope your conscience EATS AT YOU and you can't BREATHE without me
See Slim; {*screaming*
Shut up bitch! I'm trying to talk!
Hey Slim, that's my girlfriend screamin in the trunk
but I didn't slit her throat, I just tied her up, see I ain't like you
cause if she suffocates she'll suffer more, and then she'll die too
Well, gotta go, I'm almost at the bridge now
Oh shit, I forgot, how am I supposed to send this shit out?

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My envy can't describe how I loathe you for having all the stars
Leaving my eyes to marvel the sky knowing it should be mine
Yet it's you I see wasting the dream that only I deserve
I'll tear off your face to see your smile
As you build your dreams on my shattered hopes
I'll look back on a day once loved 
and fantasize for tragedy

Swallow your pride

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